Start seeing yourself as the love of your life

Images from pinterest.

Somewhere between childhood and adolescence, something changes. The world starts whispering louder than your own heart, you start seeing yourself differently. You begin to compare yourself to what you see around you, to the endless images and voices that tell you who you should be and that you're not enough. Slowly, almost without noticing, you become your own biggest critic. Noticing and hating things about yourself you never used to think twice about. You pick yourself apart and you start speaking to yourself in ways you'd never done before. 

The kindness and grace you once gave yourself begin to fade.

Yet somehow, that kindness doesn’t disappear entirely. You still know how to be loving, patient, forgiving, understanding and encouraging. Just not toward yourself. You offer that compassion freely to the people you care about most, but rarely to the person who needs it most: you. 

Somewhere along the way, you just forgot that you are also someone who deserves those same things. Your ability to love hasn’t vanished. It’s still inside you, waiting to be turned inward. You just have to start seeing yourself as the love of your life.

Think about the people you love deeply, your partner, mother, best friend, sibling or whoever it is. You would never speak to them the way you sometimes speak to yourself. You’d never call them names, point out their flaws, or tear them down when they’re hurting. You’d speak with care, choose your words carefully, because you'd want them to feel safe, seen and loved.

You would never treat someone you care about the way you sometimes treat yourself. For them, you´d be tender, checking that they´ve eaten, that they have had a good day, and that they felt enough. You’d speak gently, offer kindness in every word. It’s strange, isn’t it? You already know how to care, it just feels harder when the person in need is you.

The way you speak to yourself shapes far more than just your mood, it shapes the entire rhythm of your life. Your words influence how you care for yourself, how you show up and how you move through the world. The phrases you repeat in your mind, day after day, slowly settle into something familiar, until they begin to feel like your inner truth. Those quiet thoughts turn into feelings and those feelings shape your choices, your behavior and how you live your life. 

So practice the same kindness with yourself that you give so freely to others. Pause and ask: would you speak this way to the person you love most? Would you treat them like this or think these thoughts about them? If the answer is no, then it´s time to stop doing that to yourself too. 

Change doesn't happen all at once. It takes time, patience and consistency. Small shifts in how you see yourself, think about yourself and speak to yourself grow into habits and habits shape your future. Give yourself grace. Be gentle. Want better for yourself, just as you would for someone you love.